Days till Surgery: 19
Days till Old Age: 27
Girl, you need to sit down and shut that mouth of yours. Sure, you're running for Democratic presidential candidate, but that doesn't give you the right to be a stupid smart ass. Right now, the Republicans are sitting on their enlarged asses, rubbing their hammy palms together gleefully, pleased with how we're still tearing each other new assholes while they all focus on their actual candidate. And sure, we're behind because we still haven't decided on a final candidate, but that means we should be having a friendly election right now, so in the end, people are pleased with the candidate regardless - seeing as that would actually put as on equal ground with the Republicans.
But, we're not. And I suppose I can't entirely blame you, especially seeing as you and Hillary are duking it out in a groundbreaking election. But I can want to smack you in your bratty little mouth.
Okay sure, maybe you don't want to be Hillary's running mate. And maybe you don't want to have her be yours. But that would be a good thing, and for you to be her VP would probably be the best goddamn thing for this country right now. You say "she says I'm not experienced enough to be president - then why would I be experienced enough to be VP???"
Okay, fucker, here's why: Because VP is second in command. Not first, second. And sure, if something should happen you would become president, but that means you are the next best fit for the position. Certainly she'd want you over some of the other Democratic candidates. A Hillary/Obama team would be unstoppable - it'd be what we'd need if McCain chose that manic, evolution-denying, "let's rewrite the Constitution as God commanded it!" Huckabee for his running mate. (But at least Huckabee plays the guitar and doesn't whine like a little bitch - and that's a pretty bad ass combo right there.)
Days till Old Age: 27
Girl, you need to sit down and shut that mouth of yours. Sure, you're running for Democratic presidential candidate, but that doesn't give you the right to be a stupid smart ass. Right now, the Republicans are sitting on their enlarged asses, rubbing their hammy palms together gleefully, pleased with how we're still tearing each other new assholes while they all focus on their actual candidate. And sure, we're behind because we still haven't decided on a final candidate, but that means we should be having a friendly election right now, so in the end, people are pleased with the candidate regardless - seeing as that would actually put as on equal ground with the Republicans.
But, we're not. And I suppose I can't entirely blame you, especially seeing as you and Hillary are duking it out in a groundbreaking election. But I can want to smack you in your bratty little mouth.
Okay sure, maybe you don't want to be Hillary's running mate. And maybe you don't want to have her be yours. But that would be a good thing, and for you to be her VP would probably be the best goddamn thing for this country right now. You say "she says I'm not experienced enough to be president - then why would I be experienced enough to be VP???"
Okay, fucker, here's why: Because VP is second in command. Not first, second. And sure, if something should happen you would become president, but that means you are the next best fit for the position. Certainly she'd want you over some of the other Democratic candidates. A Hillary/Obama team would be unstoppable - it'd be what we'd need if McCain chose that manic, evolution-denying, "let's rewrite the Constitution as God commanded it!" Huckabee for his running mate. (But at least Huckabee plays the guitar and doesn't whine like a little bitch - and that's a pretty bad ass combo right there.)
Groupies to the left!Point is, Obama, you're not ready to be president - but you're ready to be VP. Guaranteed at least 4 years, and probably 8 with a winning ticket, you would finally have the experience to go along with your enthusiasm and charisma. You could earn the respect and trust of all the people that are on the fence about you right now, and you could be hugely responsible for ushering in an unprecedented 12, even 16 years of peace and prosperity for this country.
So stop being a douche. Stop whining. Stop attacking Hillary. Sure, she needs to step off a bit too, but at least she's putting the offer out there and extending the proverbial olive branch. Now listen up: if you keep ripping at her, and further dividing the two camps, some Democrats could choose not to vote for her. They may not vote at all. And then we're playing right into the Republican's hopes - if we divide ourselves, the Republicans win. So shut the fuck up and play nice. Thanks.
So stop being a douche. Stop whining. Stop attacking Hillary. Sure, she needs to step off a bit too, but at least she's putting the offer out there and extending the proverbial olive branch. Now listen up: if you keep ripping at her, and further dividing the two camps, some Democrats could choose not to vote for her. They may not vote at all. And then we're playing right into the Republican's hopes - if we divide ourselves, the Republicans win. So shut the fuck up and play nice. Thanks.
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