Most Amusing Google Search That Leads to This Blog:
Vagina smiley faces
Because we all know that vaginas are only happy when they're smiling
Dumbest Question of The Week:
"Is this a Subway?" -Man standing in the Subway, looking at the menu board with Subway written all over it, to the Subway worker with the Subway logo apron on.
Wherein the obvious is entirely hidden behind a mask of painful stupidity and ineptitude
My Vote for a "Darwin Awards" Submission:
The Deputy Mayor of Delhi, India was killed by wild monkeys that attacked him on his terrace; he fell from the first-floor terrace when trying to fight off the monkeys and died the next day.
So not only was he attacked hilariously by monkeys, but he only fell one story and still managed to die? Awkward!
Awesomest GMail Headline of The Week:
"Beserk Drunk Elephants Get Zapped": Six Asiatic wild elephants were electrocuted as they went berserk after drinking rice beer in India's remote northeast, a wildlife official said Tuesday. (according to CNN: They got drunk, uprooted a utility pole carrying power lines and were electrocuted in Chandan Nukat, a village nearly 150 miles west of Shillong, the capital of Meghalaya state. "There would have been more casualties had the villagers not chased them away," said Dipu Mark, a local conservationist. The elephants are known to have a taste for rice beer brewed by tribal communities in India's northeast.)
Basically it's just like a frat party at Lambda Chi, only in Africa, and with neighbors that protest rather than enter wet t-shirt contests
Best Coming Out Not Orchestrated By Perez Hilton:
JK Rowling explains at a reading in Los Angeles that Dumbledore was not only gay, but was involved with the dark wizard Grindenwald when they were younger - and suffered from unrequited love in an ultimately doomed relationship. A much beloved children's character is openly homosexual, marking a big step forward for gay rights and acceptance.
Preteens and teens everywhere happily embrace this new information, while crazy adults are convinced they're harmed and saddened
Craziest Baby of the Week:
A 14-month-old boy was "sucked out of his home - crib and all - and thrown 40 or 50 feet by a powerful tornado that struck his home in Michigan on Friday night," according to NBC.com. The baby not only survived, but was entirely unharmed in the process of, you know, getting sucked out of his house by a fucking tornado.
Now that's the kind of baby you don't put in a blender - that things fucking invincible. I can smell the future benjamins from here!
Vagina smiley faces
Because we all know that vaginas are only happy when they're smiling
Dumbest Question of The Week:
"Is this a Subway?" -Man standing in the Subway, looking at the menu board with Subway written all over it, to the Subway worker with the Subway logo apron on.
Wherein the obvious is entirely hidden behind a mask of painful stupidity and ineptitude
My Vote for a "Darwin Awards" Submission:
The Deputy Mayor of Delhi, India was killed by wild monkeys that attacked him on his terrace; he fell from the first-floor terrace when trying to fight off the monkeys and died the next day.
So not only was he attacked hilariously by monkeys, but he only fell one story and still managed to die? Awkward!
Awesomest GMail Headline of The Week:
"Beserk Drunk Elephants Get Zapped": Six Asiatic wild elephants were electrocuted as they went berserk after drinking rice beer in India's remote northeast, a wildlife official said Tuesday. (according to CNN: They got drunk, uprooted a utility pole carrying power lines and were electrocuted in Chandan Nukat, a village nearly 150 miles west of Shillong, the capital of Meghalaya state. "There would have been more casualties had the villagers not chased them away," said Dipu Mark, a local conservationist. The elephants are known to have a taste for rice beer brewed by tribal communities in India's northeast.)
Basically it's just like a frat party at Lambda Chi, only in Africa, and with neighbors that protest rather than enter wet t-shirt contests
Best Coming Out Not Orchestrated By Perez Hilton:
JK Rowling explains at a reading in Los Angeles that Dumbledore was not only gay, but was involved with the dark wizard Grindenwald when they were younger - and suffered from unrequited love in an ultimately doomed relationship. A much beloved children's character is openly homosexual, marking a big step forward for gay rights and acceptance.
Preteens and teens everywhere happily embrace this new information, while crazy adults are convinced they're harmed and saddened
Craziest Baby of the Week:
A 14-month-old boy was "sucked out of his home - crib and all - and thrown 40 or 50 feet by a powerful tornado that struck his home in Michigan on Friday night," according to NBC.com. The baby not only survived, but was entirely unharmed in the process of, you know, getting sucked out of his house by a fucking tornado.
Now that's the kind of baby you don't put in a blender - that things fucking invincible. I can smell the future benjamins from here!
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